Different day, Same old shit

Posted on Wednesday, August 3rd, 2005, 3:58 PM

Turns out I had reason to be nervous, to be worried… because this is me we’re talking about here, right? And why else would I expect anything different than to go in for a 15week appointment and find out my baby had died one day past my last appointment, four weeks ago? That’s right, no heartbeat. No growth. Nothing.Nothing except an appointment tomorrow to go over financial arrangements with the dr’s office and get some sort of SOMETHING inserted into me. And an appointment early Friday to “take care of it.”

So fucking unfair.

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19 Comments

  1. Gravatar Posted by Garnet 08.3.2005, 4:23 pm

    Oh my, Callista, I am so very sorry to hear this. You must be absolutely devestated. You have my deepest sympathies. And you are in my thoughts and prayers. (And Honey’s too). Take care of yourself right now. Time heals.

  2. Gravatar Posted by Fuzzy 08.3.2005, 5:03 pm

    Oh Sweet, I’m so heartbroken.. Speechless and crying and angry and I can’t imagine the heartbreak you are all going through right now. My soul is with you, dh, the boy, and your sweet angel

  3. Gravatar Posted by Touch of Grey » Blog Archive » Beyond Words 08.3.2005, 5:12 pm

    [...] at makes my family’s stress seem like a day at Disneyland.. One of my best friends, Callista, lost her dear sweet baby.. What can you say to that?? I c [...]

  4. Gravatar Posted by Maggie 08.3.2005, 5:45 pm

    Yikes…
    Garnet sent me to send condolences. I’m sorry about your loss, and feel so incredibly blessed right now.

  5. Gravatar Posted by Jen 08.3.2005, 5:48 pm

    I’m heartbroken, as well…a million prayers and hugs and all my love coming your way :(

  6. Gravatar Posted by Denise 08.3.2005, 6:16 pm

    Fucking unfair pretty much sums it up. If I could come there and hug you I would. I don’t know what to do to help you heal. Marilyn, I’m so sorry, I just don’t know what to say.

  7. Gravatar Posted by kiwi 08.4.2005, 6:19 am

    Oh Calista, I am so, so sorry for you and your family. There are no words strong enough to say how unfair this is. I’m thinking of you with all my heart. I don’t know what else to say but I’m sorry… Take good care of yourself.

  8. Gravatar Posted by msthang 08.4.2005, 8:29 am

    OMG! How tragic. I am so sorry to hear about your loss. I wish there was something I could say to make the pain easier, but I know there’s nothing I can do. I am praying for you and your family though.

  9. Gravatar Posted by PJ 08.4.2005, 9:45 am

    I’m stopping by from Kiwi and I just wanted to say how sorry I am. I can’t even imagine what you must be feeling right now. I’ll be thinking of you and your family.

  10. Gravatar Posted by Jenn 08.4.2005, 10:16 am

    Also stopping by from Kiwi and I am so, so very sorry. My thoughts and tears are with you.

  11. Gravatar Posted by gwen 08.4.2005, 11:33 am

    Callista, I’m so sorry for you and your family. My thoughts, tears, and anguish are with you.

  12. Gravatar Posted by Christine 08.4.2005, 12:35 pm

    I am so very sorry for your loss! (((hugs)))

    (Garnet sent me over.)

  13. Gravatar Posted by Dooneybug 08.4.2005, 1:29 pm

    Stopping by from Kiwi too….I’m so sorry for your terrible loss. I’m sure you are in a bit of shock. Lots of prayers and thoughts your way.

  14. Gravatar Posted by Lala 08.4.2005, 1:49 pm

    This is an enormous loss, one that boggles the mind. I’m very very sad for you. I cannot fathom the pain, the stunned loss you must feel. Please know that some of us are out here thinking and praying for you.

    ….it’s just not right…..

  15. Gravatar Posted by angela marie 08.4.2005, 4:55 pm

    I’m here from Garnet’s. I’m so sorry. Unreal and it boggles the mind as I read your happiness and trepidation from your last appointment turn to realization and anger and sadness. “unfair” doesn’t even cover it.

  16. Gravatar Posted by Cristina 08.4.2005, 5:32 pm

    So sorry

  17. Gravatar Posted by Amanda 08.4.2005, 6:47 pm

    It is fucking unfair. I’m so very sorry. You will be in my thoughts.

  18. Gravatar Posted by Jen P 08.5.2005, 8:39 pm

    Just so so so sorry to find this news. And so sorry to be finding it so late. Wishing you some peace and rest and something very, very beautiful very soon.

  19. Gravatar Posted by melanie 08.5.2005, 10:10 pm

    I am so so sorry right now. I don’t really have anything else to say. I have had two d&c’s and I do understand about that part….but not the other. I’m so sorry…