
by Marilyn on October 31, 2005
Happy Halloween, ya’ll!
I’m “manning the fort” while the boys are out gathering sweets. I’ve so far given out to five kids, in about 20 minutes. Maybe 15. Like I can think back that far.
The boy looked GREAT in his costume, as you can see. That costume rocks pretty hard. It’s got the whole voice modulator and he can press a button to make it do the breathing thing or spit out a line from the movies. Sounds awesome! The lights on his chest light up too. All in all, a really rocking costume. He was so proud of it. He went out with the neighbor girl who is 3 and was VERY resistant to wearing her costume so she didn’t. She’s still cute (as you can see). H *adores* this little girl.
I’m so proud of last night’s pumpkins! K’s turned out FANTASTIC (we wanted a sort of “ghost face” to go with the white pumpkin) and I can’t believe what a good job H did on his little pumpkin. It was his FIRST time carving a pumpkin, using one of those kid safe carver knives. And I think he did a great job. And my “Halo” pumpkin turned out nice too. Course, it took twice the time to do. Gotta love Dremel tools.
Worked pretty nice but it was hard to get just the right depth so that the light would show through. Yeesh.
Our porch looks pretty kickin’ too. We put out six purple “bat-themed” luminaries leading up to the door, plus the carved pumpkins, a skull candle, an electric jack o’ lantern, the teeny pumpkins that H drew on this morning and the absolute coolest motion-activated ghost thingie EVER. Everyone has loved it, so far.
Back to my Simpsons (no “Treehouse of Terror”??) and listening for the doorbell! Hope you all got plenty of candy.
Hours Later: The boys are back. WOW, they did a really good job! H had two buckets full of candy. The turnout was pretty awesome. I gave away every last piece of candy we had. And I didn’t even have any for myself! I’m pretty impressed. I wasn’t expecting that much. And H also got this Millenium Falcon toy. :shock Can you believe that? The lady said, “You can have candy or a Star Wars toy.” My boy, being no fool, picked the toy and that’s what he got. I *never* got anything like that trick or treating, so I think that’s pretty awesome.
Happy Halloween (again)!

by Marilyn on October 30, 2005
Wow, I almost didn’t get a “song of the day” entry up today. It was just one of those days and the absolute last thing I felt like doing was getting on the computer and/or blogging. But, here it is! And here are our pumpkins which we *just* got finished carving. The little one in the middle? H did that one. We grew it in our garden, along with mine (the “Halo” one) and a bunch of other bitty pumpkins. The white one we bought today. Literally the *last* pumpkin in all of Reno. Damn, those sold out soon!
And this week’s song is from the Halo 2 Soundtrack. Yes, it has a soundtrack! And this is from Volume 1 even. Yeah, two volumes.
The songs pretty much kick arse. And this one has been going through my head all. day. long. So listen and enjoy.
http://lilacpixels.com/blowmeaway.mp3
They fall in line
One at a time
Ready to play
I can?t see them anyway
No time to lose
We?ve got to move
Steady your hand
I am losing sight again
Fire your guns
Its time to run
Blow me away
I will stay unless I may
After the fall
We?ll shake it off
Show me the way
Only the strongest will survive
Lead me to heaven when we die
I have a shadow on the wall
I?ll be the one to save us all
There?s nothing left
So save your breath
Lying and wait
Caught inside this tidal wave
You?re covers blown
No where to go
Holding your fate
Knowing that I will walk alone
Fire your guns
Its time to run
Blow me away
I will stay unless I may
After the fall
We?ll shake it off
Show me the way
Only the strongest will survive
Lead me to heaven when we die
I have a shadow on the wall
I?ll be the one to save us all
You wanted it back
Only the strongest will survive
Lead me to heaven when we die
I have a shadow on the wall
I?ll be the one to save us all
Save us all

by Marilyn on October 29, 2005
Though it first announced it’s status as a loose tooth weeks ago, today, H’s very first baby tooth fell out. Or rather, the first tooth to fall out fell out. I don’t know if it’s the first tooth he ever got or not (BAD MAMA!). But much fanfare was made, many pictures taken. We eventually had to go in and take it out for him, poor thing. He wasn’t wiggling it as much as maybe he could have and K was worried he’d accidentally swallow it. So about a foot or so of dental floss made into a slipknot later, the tooth was out. The one right next to it is very loose too so I imagine we’ll be going in after it before too long.
Isn’t he adorable? I just can’t believe he’s already losing teeth. He *just* started kindergarten!! Of course, he is pretty big for his age. I wonder if that has anything to do with it? Anywho. The tooth is cleaned off and residing in a clean and empty Altoids Tangerine Sours tin, waiting to be placed under his pillow tonight. What’s the tooth fairy’s going rate these days? Anyone? Anyone?

by Marilyn on October 28, 2005
Thank you so much, everyone, for your words of support and encouragement after yesterday’s (somewhat jumbled) post. I really appreciate it, it’s nice to know I have people “gunning for me” through this ordeal. Yeah, that’s a good word for it. Ordeal.
It shouldn’t be like this. I should be happy about trying to get pregnant, shouldn’t I? Or at least be happy to *be* pregnant, when and if the time comes, right? That’s just not going to happen. I will not enjoy being pregnant ever again, I’m sure. If you’d known me five years ago, you’d realize what a contrast that is. I loved being pregnant with H. I even loved being pregnant with Jackson. It was so fullfilling to be creating life. I know that sounds corney, but there you have it.
What I will need, to get through, is lots of distractions and lots of prayers and good wishes. And it sounds like I will be having the latter in spades.
Thanks, guys, you’re the greatest.

by Marilyn on October 27, 2005
So I keep meaning to mention this but, of course, consistantly forget. While I’m sitting still for three-seconds… (dang, I got caught up in VH1’s I :heart the 80’s: 3D there for a minute) I’m going to bring it up.
I started Clomid on Monday. Yep. Monday. So I’m nearing the end of my Clomid-run and so far so good. Only a slight nagging headache. Which hearing some of the stories some women have about Clomid, I could myself very lucky. But the point here is: this is it. Of course, if this cycle doesn’t work, we will try again.
Moreso, this is where the rollercoaster starts. We’re chugging up that steep incline right now… maybe we’ll get lucky and reach the top quickly but it may take some time/months to get there. And then? The “fun” begins.
This is our last turn on the roller coaster if we fail yet again. If we’re sucessful, maybe we’ll try again. But there’s such a feeling of finality here. And I feel so nervous. I’m trying not to think about it, because I know being nervous and uptight is the last thing I need when riding the TTC Train.
Anyhow, I’m not making any sense, even to myself. I keep drifting off and watching VH1. Damn, I suck. Anyhow. Commence obsessing.