And being pregnant is only part of the reason why! I’m such a nerd. At E3 (Electronic Entertainment Expo held in Los Angeles this week), just this afternoon, Bungie (the studio behind Halo) FINALLY announced Halo 3. And me? I squealed like a little girl. Seriously. Maybe I don’t get out much, maybe I’m just a big geek. But this? Is big news around this house. I knew they’d announce it at E3, but seeing it announced is different. And watching the announcement trailer? Gives me chills. Literally. I’m so freaking excited.
So go to Bungie’s website RIGHT NOW (if you’re at all interested, of course), read about it, watch the completely awesome trailer and feel free to squee right along with me.
Just like the blissful absence of acne in my second trimester, I was also virtually free from worry.? Those were a good three months.? And honestly, being that’s the longest chunk of time I spend knowing I’m pregnant (since you “miss” the first month of the first trimester and I’ll be going in for an early c-section in the third trimester), that’s pretty good.? But those good times are gone. Gone, gone, gone, gone, gone, GONE.
The worry, my friends, is back.? During the first trimester, there was such uncertainty.? The dream could end at any time and I might not know until I stepped into the doctor’s office.? The second trimester, however, was bliss.? I got the doppler and could listen to that daily to reassure myself.? And then the kicks started and they were so reliable.? And so strong.? What’s the difference now?? I still have the doppler and there are still kicks.
Maybe it’s because the kicks are changing.? Already.? I didn’t expect any changes for a while but I’m noticing a difference.? More rolls than kicks, less defined movement.? What about the doppler?? I still can grab it out and have a listen at any time.? And I have gone back to listening every day.? But I find myself freaking out when I think the heartbeat is slower than it normally is or there are any skips or changes in the beat…? The long and short of it is, I think it’s because I’ve entered the Third Trimester Minefield.? I’m waiting, almost *expecting* what happened with Jackson to happen again.? Unlikely though it is.? I feel like I’m white-knuckling it through these last weeks and months.? Maybe I’ll feel better once we start up the non-stress tests at the doctor’s office.? Maybe I’ll never feel better.
I just want this baby so bad.? And I’m so scared I won’t get him or her.
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This is me. I'm a thirtysomething stay at home mom to three kids. For years I was a stay at home mom to one kid and trying very hard to have more. It took a LONG time (ie: 6 1/2 years), but finally Liam arrived and charmed us with his blue eyes and ginormous, round head. Then we got a shock: I was pregnant again and this time it was a GIRL. Our hearts and home are full at last and now that we're done having babies, we get to relax (snort) and watch them grow (not too fast now, you hear?). Thanks for coming by, feel free to dip into my archives, read my About and History pages (just don't do Jackson's Story without tissues!) and make yourself at home.
