July 2006

Things got busy all of a sudden. I got really excited when my OB came in the room, all ready for the c-section. I knew then that things were about to get underway. I was helped out of the bed for the “journey” through the doors and into the operating room. I don’t remember the walk, and am a little concerned that my “showy” hospital gown might have given people a peep show. I’d like to think not, but i honestly don’t even remember. The OR was the same one as with Jackson. Heck, as far as I know, that might be the only OR they have on that floor period. I walked over to the table and used the little stool to hop up onto it.

It was then time for the spinal. I was a little surprised, as if I expected some sort of “foreplay” or something before diving into the heavy stuff. Well, and also because I was a little nervous of the spinal. I’d had a quasi epidural before, but I was in hard and heavy labor and who the heck CARED. But I was going in pain-free and wouldn’t have labor to distract me. Dr. Kang was fantastic though, and he’d gone over all the procedure for getting a spinal with me, and repeated the process as he was doing it so I was at least well informed, if nothing else. I felt the “bee sting” of the local anesthetic. Then my legs started to feel warm. I pointed out that my left leg felt a little warmer than my right and Dr. Kang adjusted something. Then, they laid me back on the table. None too soon too, as I was already starting to feel the tinglyness crawling up my legs. Weird!

As the doctors and nurses prepped me for surgery, they discussed “Pirates of the Carribean”, which had just come out. There was much discussion about Orlando Bloom and how hot he was. Dr. Kang was the only guy in the room at the moment, and made a wisecrack about him being “dreamy”. Hehe! While this was going on, they were putting up my drape and giving me the betadyne rub-down. The my OB tested my spinal, much to my surprise, since I didn’t know until Dr. Kang asked if I felt any of that. Any of what? “Good,” he said. “She was pinching you pretty hard.” Yow! They made the first incision, completely painless. I don’t think I felt a thing at that point. Then Kile was ushered in. I remember looking back and being concerned about him seeing over the drape, since he had said he didn’t want to see anything. He has since told me that whatever he did or didn’t see didn’t bother him but the smell of the cauterized incision did a wee bit. I didn’t notice, of course, because I had some tubes up my nose. I guess I should be thankful.

After that, things went pretty quickly. Kile held my hand and I felt the strangest of sensations. All that I’d read on c-sections hadn’t even prepared me for how strange it felt. But it didn’t hurt, not one bit. It was almost a tickling feeling, high up in my chest. And I did feel the “breathless” feeling that Dr. Kang had warned me about, so I concentrated on just breathing deeply through it and I was fine.

And then? My OB said, “Here he is!” Kile surprised me by standing up to look. I heard a cry, the most awesome sound in the entire world. It was high pitched, a little squeaky, and utterly adorable. I’m not generally a weepy sort of person. I don’t often cry at things that most people do. But I definitely got teary in that moment and I felt enormous relief. And I had a smile permanently glued to my face. He was here, and he was safe. They held him up over the curtain so I got a glimpse of him. I was surprised how “clean” he was. Not your typical bloody newborn here! The nurses had barely to mention that Kile could accompany the baby to the warmer with them before he was gone from my side without a backwards glance. :lol

He stood over there snapping pictures like a regular paparazzo while I laid on the table, getting stiched back up again, and listening to my son’s cries. Kile did yet another thing he had said he wouldn’t do; cut the cord. Looking back, it was a good thing he did. Very theraputic for him to triumph over the very organ which had stolen our other baby from us. So I’m very glad he did it. And so is he. Overall, he thinks the c-section was “cool” and very interesting. And Liam’s APGAR scores were the stuff parents dream of. 9 right off the bat, and the nurses almost called the second one 10, before settling on 9. Truly, very good for a 37 weeker who wasn’t even 5 pounds! Kile grabbed some video from those early moments that you can see here.

Finally, he brought Liam over to me, so I could see him better and touch his little face. Sure, it would have been wonderful to hold him, but Kile was holding him and as happy as I was to see this baby here with us safe and sound, seeing Kile hold him and seeing his joy was unspeakably wonderful as well. I could tell behind his surgical mask that he was as happy as I’d ever seen him. So seeing my baby, and seeing my husband… that was the most awesome thing in the world. I could relive that moment for the rest of my life.

After that, things were pretty much by the book. Kile took the baby back to the nursery to watch and moon over, and then took my parents and Harry down to the nursery to look through the window at the little fella. Meanwhile, I was shuttled over to Room 203 a mere 30 minutes after being taken into the OR to recover. My nose was EXTREMELY itchy, but Joy cautioned me not to itch it. She gave me a cool, wet washcloth to pat at it with while the anesthesia wore off. I cooled my heels in recovery for quite a while, received a few visitors and basked in my enormous relief while waiting for my postpartum room to be ready. Thankfully, Kile brought me the camera so I could see all the pictures and video clips that he’d taken. Where was that wonderful gadget when Harry was born??

So that’s the story of Liam’s arrival into the world. Less than two weeks ago, but already I couldn’t picture my life without him. He is TRULY a blessing to us.

Yeah, big shock. I haven’t posted much of anything in a few days and when you’re someone who is used to posting once a day, that’s painful. But who has the time? And honestly, when I choose between holding Liam and gazing into his mysterious (what the heck color ARE they??) eyes or typing away on the laptop, I’m gonna choose baby time every time. That’s just a simple fact.

So here are some pictures to help make up for it. I know enough about this “mommy blogging” business that you can always make up for a lack of posting with some cute baby pictures. Just click on each picture to see it bigger (who doesn’t want THAT?).

During one of his late night “wide awake” moments. He loves to look around at everything.

Naptime on mama’s lap… in a onesie that could easily threaten to swallow him whole.

Liam is perfecting the “sprawl” in order to stay cool during the hot, hot, hot afternoons.

Harry loves holding his little brother… at least he *did* until Liam spewed milk on him.

Becuase we’re “US”, we went out to eat on Sunday at Chili’s… Liam’s first lunch out. Naturally, he slept the entire time and missed it.

I’d like to promise that I’ll be back with pithy posts soon, but we know better than to expect that, don’t we?

Friday morning we got up very early, around 5:45. My bag was mostly packed, but I still had a million things to do. I had to shower, I’d learned that from experience. I had to double check that I had the baby book packed. I had to make sure the kitchen table was cleaned. You know, the sort of neurotic last minute details that really don’t matter a whole lot but they sure seem to at the time. I averted my eyes as Kile and Harry had a quick breakfast. I hadn’t eaten anything since 9:45 the night before (cinnamon toast) and I couldn’t even have a drink of water. We loaded the van up, put the dog in her kennel and pulled out around a quarter to 8:00am. We drove over to a friend’s house, a wonderful gal who offered to watch Harry for us until my parents arrived in town around noon. Harry was excited, she had a daugher his age, plus a younger girl and boy so he had plenty of kids to play with. We gave him a big, big hug and told him we’d see him later on. Next stop? The doctor’s office.

We got there right at 8:30am and they hooked me into the monitors for a NST. I was assured that they fully expected me to get my c-section that day. Since I hadn’t eaten or drank since last night, the chances of my fluid levels having gone up were slim to none and without anything to amp up the baby’s blood sugar, chances are the NST would show an “unresponsive” baby and perhaps a golden ticket to a c-section. I was monitored for 20 minutes and when the nurse came in and confirmed what we’d hoped, I felt a thrill of excitement. We were going to have an ultrasound to check the fluid levels, but my OB came in and said, “Good news! We’re on for a c-section at 12:30 today!” Woo hoo! It was about 9:30 by this point and they wanted us up in L&D at 10:30. We had a little time to kill, but not much. We walked over to the hospital. Quite a trek, even though it was all mostly indoors. We got there shortly before 10 and checked in at the desk in admitting. We still had some time to kill so we sat in the chairs in the lobby and watched “Regis and Kelly” which was on the TV. We saw an older lady come over with a preschool-aged boy and sit next to us. They were joined in a few minutes by a bunch of other people and it became apparent that these people were here to visit a new mom upstairs in Maternity. And the little boy was a brand new big brother, there to see his baby sister for the first time. The entire scene was just adorable and Kile and I were smiling to each other over it.

After killing some time in the gift shop, we went ahead upstairs. We checked in at Labor and Delivery and were shown to a room, 204. It was right next to the doors leading back to the operating rooms. We got settled in, I got undressed and robed up, and the nurse came in to administer my IV. I needed to suck down two bags of fluids prior to the surgery so best to get it going now. We watched television, made some phone calls and killed time. I asked Kile about getting my bag and the laptop. I wanted to be able to go on my blog and post about getting the c-section. I’d sent a rather brief and un-descriptive message through my cell phone earlier but I was wanting to expand on that. He wanted to wait until AFTER the c-section and I had a postpartum room. Bleh.

I was going to get my catheter (why were the nurses always calling it a foley?) in the OR after I got the spinal, but then I started to have pee real bad so I told the nurse she could just go ahead and do it then. She also gave me the shave treatment, which is always an enjoyable experience. Around 12pm, we heard a nurse down the hall call out, “209 is crashing!” Sounded pretty desperate and Kile and I exchanged a look. Pretty soon after, a bed came flying past our room and through the doors to the OR. Not long after, the nurse came in to tell us we’d been “bumped”. Understandably so! She said it might be 1 or 1:30. I didn’t mind waiting a little. A) I’d been in that poor woman’s shoes before and b) what was another half hour or hour? I’d been waiting this long… I was suddenly feeling very patient.

We called my parents and told them about the delay.? They were a little delayed getting into town anyhow, so it was all good.? The anesthesiologist, Dr. Kang, came in to introduce himself and go over some pre-op stuff.? He explained how the spinal would go and the timeline of the c-section.? Very nice guy, very cool. We also met our delivery nurse.? And you know what?? It was Joy.? The very same nurse we had before, during and after Jackson’s birth.? What are the chances?

Shortly after 1:30, Joy came into the room to tell us:? It’s time.? Kile got his “scrubs” on and I was helped out of bed to walk into the OR of my own volition.? This was it…? what we’d been waiting for so many years.? It all boiled down to this.? Excited?? Understatement.

To be continued…

The whirr of the pump drones on…

The story of our Adventures in Breastfeeding starts where most of these sorts of stories starts, on baby’s birth day. Liam was so tiny, I worried about feeding him. He made the motions of nursing, but I wanted to make sure we were “doing it right” so I asked the nurse to have the Lactation Consultant stop by and help us out. She came by and checked out Liam’s latch and said it looked like he was doing a great job. But that he might need some more “coaching” (me as well, I’m sure!). No one would be in the office on Saturday or Sunday but that someone would stop by for sure on Monday. In the meantime, I should keep trying him at the breast.

In the meantime, he needed to drink something so we gave him formula. With his low birth-weight and probability of developing jaundice, we needed to make sure he was getting enough to eat. The nurses gave us Enfamil Lipil to feed him and that went pretty well. Still, I asked the nurse if I could get a pump in my room, so I could maybe start working on my supply. If we were going to have trouble with breastfeeding, I’d rather he had my milk than the formula, if possible.

They brought me the Medela Lactina (pictured above) and showed me how to put it together. And we were off. I started off getting a mere 5ml per pumping session, but that was at least something. The next time the LC came by, on Monday, I expressed concern at Liam’s ability to nurse. He would latch on, suck a little and then either get frustrated with hunger and detach, or settle down and suck just lightly, as if in his sleep. So she brought in a scale to help us determine if he was indeed getting milk. Because his latch was spot on, and he was definitely sucking. She weighed him and then he nursed on both sides for a total of about a half hour. She came back and weighed him again. No change. Not one gram. And that meant he wasn’t getting any milk.

Now, it could be a one-time deal, or this could be something that was happening every time he nursed. Judging from our experience so far, I was inclined to believe the latter. The LC recommended that we rent a pump just like the one we were using and gave us the number of the rental service company located there at the hospital. She assured me that since he had gusto for nursing and a great latch, that it would only be a matter of time until he was big and strong enough to get the milk himself. And to make sure I was putting him to the breast in the meantime, to get him used to the experience of nursing.

So Kile stopped in at the rental service and found out the rental was $45 a month, not terribly bad. However, there was also a deposit of $35. To put it plainly, we just didn’t have that right then. Kile had just paid a bunch of bills that morning.? We needed some groceries, to get gas and various other things.? This was just NOT in the budget.? And I?? Lost my nut.? The lack of sleep and the hormones and the stress of the situation collided and I turned into a sobbing mass. Kile, feeling stressed enough as it was, didn’t particularly care for my waterworks, but I quite literally couldn’t stop myself.? But I got myself mostly under control by the time the nurse stopped in.? She could tell I was upset and I knew better than to put her off.? Those nurses can be persistant.? And I didn’t want to make it into a big deal so I told her we were a little worried about having a pump at home to feed the baby with.? She said she would talk to the LC about this, see if they couldn’t find a good solution.

So the LC (otherwise known as The Saint of Breasfeeders) came by and her kindness still takes my breath away.? She offered to loan us, free of charge, a pump (another Lactina) in her office that she often would loan out to mothers of babies in the NICU.? I believe at this point, I had to pick my jaw up from the floor.? And it didn’t stop there.? She also gave us an Advent pack she had that included the Via storage containers a bottle AND an Isis pump.? :eek? Can you believe that?? I nearly was kissing her feet as she left.? That woman is a goddess.

Luckily, I’ve now got a pump in place, a used Medela PIS so I can return the Lactina.? We’re going to try it out tonight and see how it goes. :)? Wish us luck, because I feel we may need it.