Not having, you know, a uterus or anything gets in the way of men having babies. Obviously. But think there are deeper, more profound reasons why men don’t have babies. Personally, I just don’t think they can handle the pressure.

Which isn’t to say that dads can’t take fantastic care of their babies when called on to do so. Few men I know are as good with children (even including delicate newborns) as Kile is. He’s got a real heart for them, and the kids just love him right back. In fact, when it comes to taking care of OTHER people’s children, he’s the one you want. Not me. But that’s something we’ve already covered here before and I’m sure we’ll cover again before it’s all said and done. ANYHOW. Getting off topic.

I’m just saying that when the shit hits the fan, the daily grind becomes just that (a GRIND, hoo boy, what a grind), that perhaps men just aren’t equipped to handle it.

I’ve lost my fair share of patience with Liam, even though I love him to itty, bitty, teeny, weeny pieces. But I’ve also noticed that sometimes (SOMETIMES), Kile’s patience is thinner than mine. He’s fantastic for jumping in when I’m at my wits end and I NEED A BREAK, so help me GOD. But I need to remember to give him a break too, usually in a couple hours. Especially if it’s late at night.

Also, he can’t take the hours. Bless him, he tries. And he NEVER complains (though I do, and OFTEN). But I think he just plain needs more sleep than I do. Or he can’t function on less. One of the two. Take last night for instance. It was “my night”. Since Liam has been getting up (roughly) once per night, we switch off who takes care of him each night. We went to bed around 11:30 and Liam was up at 2:30 or so. I got up, fed him, rocked him, fed him some more, was thrown up on, changed him and his diaper, rocked him and went back upstairs. I laid him down but he wasn’t having it, so I picked him up, rocked, fed a little, rocked and patted and voila. He was down. Sorta. The next thirty minutes consisted of me laying next to him (lovin’ the co-sleeper), patting his back to put him back to sleep each time he’d stir until he fell into a deep enough sleep pattern. Then, finally, I got back to sleep myself. That was about 4:00. Around 5 or so, he woke up again, but Kile got up and rocked him until he fell back asleep that time. About a half hour at the most, more like 15 minutes. We both woke up at 6:30 this morning (though, admittedly, I dozed in bed for another 15 minutes. My bad).

So we get home from our adventures Out of the House this afternoon and it wasn’t five minutes in the recliner before Kile started nodding off. He has a particular illness when it comes to that chair anyhow. I’m tired, heck ya. I would love a quick snooze in the chair. But, when we got home, I had to clean bottles, change Liam, change my own shirt, pump, feed Liam and pat/rock him to sleep. Of course, once Liam was asleep, Kile got up and went upstairs presumably to “change clothes.” What he’s really doing? Playing Runescape and/or Halo. How do I know? I just KNOW.

So, whatever. As much as I’d love to have more “time off” on the evenings and weekends, I just know it won’t happen. It can’t happen. I don’t even know if it SHOULD happen. I enjoy my “job”, taking care of Liam. And if our (childcare… not household because he totally carries that column) responsibilities are a little unbalanced, it’s only because that’s really how it’s supposed to be. I’m the mom and in the beginning, I’m in the hot seat. I’m cool with that. But a nap WOULD be nice.

edited to add: FWIW, Kile has been fabulous the last couple of days.? He took yesterday off work and really helped out and tonight, I haven’t had to take care of Liam once since he got home.? So bonus points to Kile.? And he hasn’t even read this!? Yet. *gulp*

^anyhow….

In other news: I put a new video up on the “Videos” page called, “Funny Dream”. It’s one I took of Liam just yesterday. He’s been giggling in his sleep lately and this was my attempt to capture it. I didn’t get a true giggle, but I got a couple little chuckles. It’s cute, at any rate. Go check it out.