If I’m a babysitter, where’s my paycheck?

by Marilyn on January 27, 2007

Yes, I’m still upset about this. It’s one of those things, the more I watch the video clip, and the more I think about it, the more it just gets under my skin and really ticks me off. I mean, I expected “The Today Show” to put a negative slant on the whole thing. Why? Because this is America and we would hate to admit that mom’s are responsible adults who are allowed to do more than chase after children. And that where children are involved, the media feels the need to tread extremely lightly and not even HINT at anything that might even be CONSTRUED as harmful. The end result is a travesty of an interview like what took place yesterday morning.

Yes, Melissa, Meredith Viera DID just call you a babysitter. And when she did that, she called me a babysitter too. And every other mom out there. Any way you look at it, it’s not saying anything remotely good about what we are doing with our lives. On the one hand, it belittles the role we play in our families. It says that all we are good for is watching the children. Not fostering their growth, shaping them into respectable citizens, of course, but just watching them to make sure they don’t throw themselves down the stairs or something. On the other hand, if we’re babysitters then where’s our paycheck? Where’s the day off? When do the “real” parents come to take them so we can relax? And, Meredith, you might wanna watch it since you are a co-founder of ClubMom. A place that claims to be “For Moms. By Moms.” A community to nurture and help moms connect with one another. I’m sure you thought you were being an impartial journalist, but what I saw was two women ganging up on Mrs. Summers, rather unfairly.

Now, all this is not to say I don’t understand the arguments against these “cocktail playgroups”. I understand there are people out there who don’t believe an adult should drink any alcohol when in the presence of children. That is their own prerogative. I think if the parent is mature and responsible enough not to over-indulge, then there isn’t anything wrong with it. I think it’s good for children to see their parents partaking in responsible alcohol consumption. I think it’s far worse for a parent to try to hide drinking from their children and family members. I think hiding is one step closer to binging. Of course, there are exceptions to both sides. Not all parents who hide drinking from children will binge and become an alcoholic. And not every mom who drinks a glass of wine in front of her children won’t become an alcoholic. This is where I put the whole “mature and responsible” thing in there. A mother should know her limitations. And if she doesn’t, she doesn’t need to drink.

Another thing that gets on my nerves about the whole thing: If a mom needs to run to the grocery store or a hair appointment without her children, and her husband is at home watching the football game and drinking a beer, no one thinks twice about it, do they? If a four couples have a backyard bar-b-que, and enjoy a couple beers while the children are playing, there isn’t a national uproar about it. It happens every weekend, all across the country. WHY?? I hate to think so, but maybe it’s because the husbands are judged differently? Simply, now bear with me here, because they’re men? Again, I hate to even suggest such a thing, but what else am I to think? Is there a double standard here? Seriously? And since America (and Meredith Viera) thinks the only thing moms are good for is babysitting their own children, you’d think that would imply they have some decent ability to parent their children, alcohol or no. Yes? Am I totally off base here?

Anyhow, obviously I’m still ticked about this. I knew “The Today Show” would take a conservative bent with this, but I didn’t expect to see the level of it that there was. I’m pretty disappointed. Let’s just give mom’s a break already. Being a mom is hard enough without the whole of society judging her every action. If she’s not blatantly endangering her children (and honestly, a glass of wine isn’t going to endanger ANYONE), get off of her back. As for me, you’ll have to excuse me while I go “babysit” my own children.

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