Yeah, I said I was done with BlogHer, didn’t I? Oops! So sue me. I’ve been noticing a lot of discontent about the conference around the web lately, and it reminds me a lot of the discontent that wafted around after last year’s conference. For the record, I was a lot happier with this years gathering. I felt a lot more comfortable this year, and I felt like I absorbed quite a bit more from the sessions and my fellow bloggers. I had a great time and left exhausted and satisfied. Truly, that’s a good thing, right?

There’s been some discussion about the “swagtroversy.” Since I was at that particular shindig (though I didn’t crash, I was actually invited (I was surprised too)), I felt a connection to the story. And while some of my most favorite bloggers EVAH were involved, I had a hard time seeing too much conflict there. Yes, the party organizers could have handled themselves a little better but they didn’t. And these people, fabulous as they are, weren’t invited. It’s a shame that it had to happen at all, but I can’t fault the people throwing the party too much. But hey, they did get free alcohol, right? Considering I had just the night before paid $11 hard earned dollars for an appletini, I think free alcohol is a pretty good deal, even if you were cut off at the end.

There are also people who have complained about different items in their swag bags. Such as the Butterball turkey pot holder. My thought? BIG DEAL. It was free. You can feel free to see it as a negative statement about your femininity, but I see it as… a free pot holder. SCORE! I don’t do most of the cooking in the house so I gave it to my husband and my seven year old was very excited to have yet another pot holder with which to get hot pans out of the oven with (he won’t even open the oven door without a pot holder, if that tells you anything). I think if someone wants to give me something for free, regardless of whether it’s something I will use or not, I’m going to be grateful. I was literally ecstatic about each and every piece of swag I got and became a total swag whore because it was all FREE. And I loves maself some free stuff. Same goes with the ’swagtroversy” goodies. I wasn’t even expecting any swag from that dinner party and imagine my delight when I saw that I would get to take a little something home! I didn’t poke through it until I got back to my room and was floored at their generosity. I go to BlogHer not really expecting a lot, I guess, and so I’m always over the moon about what I do get. And I think that’s the way it should be. As soon as I start feeling entitled to something, that’s when I’m going to have to take a step back and re-examine my priorities, you know?

There’s also been some rumblings lately about the “high school” issue. Before I go on, let it be known that I think both of these bloggers are fabulous and I love them much. And I don’t think they’re entirely off base. While the cliquishness of it all was a lot more subdued this year, it was there. But when I sit down and really think about it, I know that it’s pretty much unavoidable. I put myself in these womens shoes, the ones who may or may not have been doing the excluding/preening/cliquing. And I think, what would I have done differently had I been there as a more “popular” blogger. Would I have stepped away from my comfortable group and mingled with new and unfamiliar faces? Or would I have counted on “safety in numbers” and instead enjoyed my time with my small group of good friends? I’m an introvert by nature and have a very difficult time stepping outside my comfort zone. I would definitely have been the sort who would want to remain in my little group. Not because I think I’m better than anyone else, but because that is where I feel the most at ease. And so when you take a “popular” blogger who feels pretty much the same way as I do (and a lot of bloggers do, it comes with blogging as a medium), and you add me who isn’t likely to step forward and make introductions, there isn’t going to be a lot of “intermingling” going on. They’re going to stay in their little group and I’m going to stay in mine. And I’m going to make an effort not to feel resentful about it because it is as much my issue as it is theirs. What should they do, just not go? I don’t think that’s a good answer because a conference like this relies on “the more the merrier.” These “popular” bloggers have a lot to contribute to the community and I think they should be encouraged to do so. I’m disappointed there weren’t more of them there, to be honest. I don’t believe I would have had the nerve to step forward and introduce myself but maybe I could have benefited from their knowledge in the various sessions I attended. That would have been worth it, I think.

So all in all, I think no one is ever going to be 100% satisfied with these BlogHer conferences. That’s just far too much to ask of such a large and diverse community. All we can do is enjoy what we are given and what we take away.