I have to admit, ever since I’ve known for sure that we’re having a girl, I’ve been wondering if I would end up with a really, die-hard girly girl or a more rough and tumble tomboy. Of course, there’s no way to know right now, but that doesn’t stop me from speculating. I’m sure there are charms to having a girly girl, but I wasn’t one of those sorts of kids myself and have wondered if I might have a hard time relating to a little girl who was all princess, all the time.
And I wasn’t 100% a tomboy. I had a mighty love for My Little Ponies, even if mine’s head often would pop off and she would get a lot dirtier than my friends’ ponies would. I also loved to put belts on my long nightgowns because that would give them a waist and then I would dance around and feel like a princess (gah!). I had a finely refined sense of romance at a young age and was something of a subtle flirt while I was in school with boys (alas, only through 8th grade).
But I did love to play with boys and their far more fascinating toys and the dirt in your backyard was the best place to play with Hot Wheels cars, as far as I was concerned. I loved Voltron, Transformers and Construx. I wasn’t very good at sports, but I loved to ride my bike around the neighborhood and go exploring new places. I didn’t let myself get too dirty, but more because I didn’t enjoy the process of getting clean and less because I didn’t want to look dirty.
So I can’t help but wonder what kind of little girl I will have. Will she be a tomboy? Or will she be a princess? Or will she fall in-between, like I did?
I don’t know if this is something we’re just born with and all influence be damned or if a parent’s influence affects it at all. If we showered her with pink and princesses, would she be more likely to be a girly girl? If we only gave her jeans, t-shirts and Hot Wheels, would she end up more a tomboy? I think we’ll get what we get and our input will have minimal effect on the girl she becomes. Our relaxed natures might have some influence, or at least I can hope. Because if she’s all girl, all the time then I think I’m in big trouble.
{ 6 comments }
Lisa 01.21.08 at 11:56 am
Personally? I think that parents and siblings have a lot to do with it. Sure, some of it will be just her. She’ll be what she’ll be. But she’ll love the things she does with you and her brothers. If she falls in with a girly crowd as she grows up (or in her tween years), that’ll have a strong influence on her too. But she won’t be all about princess and fairies at age 5 if she’s used to playing xbox and Star Wars around the house. Ya know? But I also have noticed that kids seem drawn to others like them. Unless they are not in a situation where they have much choice (aka a small school, etc..)
Toni (10 comments.) 01.21.08 at 5:42 pm
I thought the same thing when I was expecting my daughter 8+ years ago. Oh, God, what if she is one of those girlie girls? I wasn’t a tomboy but I wasn’t a princess either. Well, I got the girlie girl. I haven’t had a dress on for YEARS and, yet, she refused to wear pants/shorts/pjs from 2 - 5 because they were for boys. You know what, though, it was fun! Fun to buy dresses and ribbons and bows and maryjanes! Rest assured, you’ll adapt and have fun while doing it….
Fluent Brittish (1 comments.) 01.21.08 at 6:49 pm
Congratulations on your pregnancy (I get to say that late since we’re new friends. It’s my right).
mojavi (21 comments.) 01.21.08 at 8:23 pm
like your other commenters said I wondered the same thing. At 17 months Kya already wants to carry a purse. However I think it is becuase I carry a purse/diaper bag all the time.
I was a hardcore tomboy, I always wished I was more girly… my nana told me something I will never forget though… she said, TOmboys make better wives! lol
If kya goes all girlie girl, it will be fun to be a part of. I will do my best to not roll my eyes if she HAS to HAVE all dresses… (hmmmm she is already partial to the black patent maryjanes from christmas… lol)
Nicole (6 comments.) 01.21.08 at 8:41 pm
Ok, I’m an only child and not a mom (but we’re practicing :)). I was a bit of a tomboy (like the time I punched my friend Michael when he insulted me and he ran home crying. When I was 5). As I got older I became more of a girly girl. I like shoes. I like purses.
And the best thing my parents ever did was teach me to become my own person. Perhaps a variety of toys, both traditionally “boys toys” and “girls toys”.
And have fun with her. Maybe she’ll teach you something too.
(And now I will shut my mouth and tie up my fingers, because that is WAY too much assvice :))
Michelle 01.22.08 at 5:21 am
I, too, live in fear that my baby girl will turn into a princess. Or that she was born one, however it works. I don’t own a hairdryer or curling iron. If she wants a hairstyle more complicated than a ponytail, I am SO screwed. I can figure out what to do with the bare essentials, makeup wise, but other than that, I’m in a foreign land when it comes to that stuff. So, I am hoping for someone who falls inbetween, I guess. One that likes getting dressed up on occasion, but is pretty laid back about it. I hope she does like sports, but if it turns out that she wants to take ballet lessons (and yes, I know that ballet is HARD work and should qualify as a sport but it is seen as more girlie) then that’s okay too. We’ll see what we see when we see it, I guess. For now, I’ll just keep turning her upside down, which she seems to think is the best thing EVER!
Comments on this entry are closed.