Heath Ledger.

Where do I begin?  I guess I should start by saying that I’m unnaturally upset by the news of his death.  Even just now, typing that sentence, I felt the urge to delete it.  Because I don’t want to really believe it.  I don’t want it to be true.  I want it to end up being a huge TMZ prank and we all start laughing because, “Oh, those guys!”   It’s not, and I know that.  But I keep hoping.  And then I wonder why I’m so upset and disturbed by this.

I didn’t know the guy personally, after all.  I can’t even quite remember the first movie I saw him in.  I CAN remember, however, the first movie I loved him in.  That was “10 Things I Hate About You”.  And if you haven’t seen it, rent it.   I don’t know what it was about that particular character.  I think maybe it was the part where he sang ”Can’t Take My Eyes Off You” to Julia Stiles’ character in front of the whole football field.  That was pretty much when I fell in love.  And it’s been love ever since.  I might not always love the movies he’s in, but I always can appreciate his performance.  Like “Brokeback Mountain” which I thought was actually a pretty mediocre movie.  Didn’t care for it much and for Jake Gyllenhaall even less.  BUT, say what you will about the movie, Heath Ledger was out of this world in that movie.  My husband, who actually grew up in Riverton, Wyoming (where the film supposedly mostly takes place and I can tell you, the real Riverton looks NOTHING like that), says that he was amazed at how well Heath nailed the average cowboy/ranchhand of the area and era.  He says he had to have known no less than five guys who acted just like Heath’s character (well, except for the whole gay thing).

Then, there’s his little girl.  Little Matilda.  All reports say that she just idolized her dad and that dad was just as enamored of her. Now… she has no dad.  Will she even remember him at all?  Or will she only have stories her mother tells her about her dad?  Or, even worse, just his films and her imagination?  I can’t imagine.

And, I can’t help but think it’s an enormous loss to Hollywood.  Here we had a young actor who had talent and great potential and he’s gone.  Last year, we had Anna Nichole and everyone just lost their minds when she died and what did SHE DO?  She had no acting talent.  No singing talent.  The two losses, side by side… well, there’s no comparison.  None at all.  Every death is a tragedy, of course, and the daughter Anna left behind is a tragedy in and of itself.  But which was the greater loss to Hollywood?  I don’t think it’s even a contest.

Then I look at Britney Spears… she’s got young children at home (and let’s face it, is moderately talent-less) and has everything to lose and we are supposed to tune in and watch her destroy her life one moment at a time.   And, considering the fragility of life and the outcome of throwing that life away… I just wish she would look beyond herself for a change.  I doubt Health Ledger’s death has even registered on her radar, but it should.

And, I guess I’m scared that if something were to happen to Britney, that we’d have a National Day of Mourning and she just doesn’t deserve it.

I’m not sure how this evolved into a rant about Britney.  I just wanted to say that Heath Ledger was a great actor, a great father and is a great loss to the entertainment industry.  Such a shame.  Such a loss.