I have a question to pose to you, oh dear Internets. It’s something that is being hotly contested here in our house these days and I am just not sure what the common knowledge is on this particular subject, or even if there IS any common knowledge.

What is the deal with putting hats on newborns?

Kile insists that because you lose most of your body heat through your head and because newborns have some difficulties regulating their own heat (at least at first), they should wear hats 24/7, regardless of the temperature inside or outside the house.

I have a much more laissez-faire (and, according to Kile, borderline child neglectful) policy and while hats in the hospital are all well and good, after about the first week they probably don’t need the hat all that often. I like to subscribe to the “dress them as you would dress yourself” philosophy since that makes sense to me.

So. Your job, dear Internets, is to tell me which one of us is right. What has been our experience on this particular subject, what have you done with your own children?

We’re not there yet.  Not quite.  I’m sure no one expects us to be, either.  After all, Kile is still on leave, helping me out here at home.  And we won’t have anything approaching normal until he goes back to work (please don’t think that means that I at all WANT him to go back to work because I DO NOT).  But with Kile’s mom gone back to Elko and normal life going on all around us, it’s easy to think that “this is how it will be.”  Of course, it won’t.  Evie is still asleep in her newborn coma.  I’m trying not to read too much into that (she’s still jaundiced, after all, so I worry she’s sleepy because of that).  Plus, you know, newborns are relatively easy to take care of.  They eat, they sleep and they poop.  And that’s about it.

Liam seems “adjusted”.  Of course, I’m aware that this could all change at a moment’s notice.  But he seems genuinely okay with having the little bundle around all the time.  He loves to look at her when we’re in the car, since he has a good view of her from his carseat.  If she fusses, he “talks” to her.  It’s rather adorable, actually.  He’s got a good heart, that one.

Harry has proclaimed Evie to be the cutest baby ever.  He really is taken with her and it charms me how differently he has reacted towards her than he did towards Liam.  Not that he didn’t love Liam, but it’s different.  No, his relationship with Liam is much different.  They were playing last night, rough housing in the living room, chasing each other, giggling and laughing and wrestling.  It made my heart swell to watch them, it did.

Kile actually went in to the office this morning.  He’s just helping out with something for a couple hours.  Thankfully, he took Liam with him.  Not only will this ensure his timely return, but I frankly can’t handle Liam here alone yet.  I can’t pick him up, for starters, and in order to do just about anything for him, I need to be able to pick him up.  Plus, the ladies in his office just adore Liam so I’m sure his being there won’t be an issue.

So that leaves me here at home, alone, with Evie.  I think I’ll take advantage of her snoozing to go hop in the shower real quick.  I’ll utilize the whole “bouncy seat outside the shower” technique so I can keep a good eye on her.  Of course, knowing that damned Murphy and his dang law, she’ll wake up and want to eat just about the time I’m sudsing up my hair.  Anyone care to lay a wager on that?

^{That wrinkly turtle neck of hers just slays me.}

^{Liam saw me take Evie’s picture and wanted one of him.  I love when he cocks his head to the side like this.}

^{These two played together all evening.  It was adorable.}  

^{I don’t think she has him charmed one bit, do you?}

It has come to my attention lately that there are some loose ends that may need a neat, little bow to finish them off.  Unfortunately, I’m not very good at tying bows.  In fact, I have no idea how to tie a decent bow at all.  This could be a problem here in a few years when Evie wants a bow in her hair or on her dress, etc and so forth.  GAH.  So I guess we’ll have to put up with a shoelace-style bow when it comes to tying up the loose ends I’ve left laying around this here blog the last week or so.  If you don’t mind, I don’t mind.  Deal?

• I did go with tubal ligation as my birth control of choice.  I realize this was probably made apparent both by this post and by my mention of getting a tubal done in Evie’s birth story.  But still.  I felt I should elaborate and clarify.  I chose it because it made the most sense.  I still do appreciate everyone’s input on it, and everyone’s comment and vote meant a lot to me.  And I definitely understood why so many of you championed the vasectomy.  The only reason it wasn’t one of my “choices” was because the tubal was something that could be taken care of at the time of the c-section and the Mirena could be done either while in the hospital or at my six week appointment.  No extra appointments needed.  My major problem with the Mirena was it’s method of preventing pregnancy and that it wasn’t permanent.  My problem with a tubal was that it could increase potential for a tubal pregnancy.  Permanence was NOT an issue, which I assured my doctor.  So our plan now, is to have Kile go ahead and get a vasectomy here in the next year.  Double up our protection, so to speak.  The tubal only took a few more minutes at the end of my c-section (the major difference is the nurse brought me Evie’s weight and length there instead of in the recovery room like with Liam).  And I had the ever entertaining heart and blood pressure monitor to keep me entertained.  Now, I don’t know if the tubal has anything to do with how much more difficult my recovery has been this time.  Could just be because I’m older and this is my fourth c-section, which seems more likely.  And, for what it’s worth, it does feel strange to realize that I am technically STERILE now.  Weird.
• Breastfeeding is going GREAT.  Such a relief, after the struggle and failure to breastfeed Liam.  I was nervous about it, that’s true.  It’s been 8 years since I’ve actually breastfed anyone, after all.  I’m still having sore nipple problems, putting Lansinoh on whenever I think of it, and pumping on the right side.  It’s a lot better than it was, I even tried nursing her on that side but it is still very sore.  I do wonder if it’s sore because it has only been pumped for the last week and not nursed on and doesn’t have the callus there. (Is this too much information?  I never can tell…)  All that aside, she’s already a champ and it amazes me at how naturally she picked it up.  I had a lot harder time with Harry, of course, we were both newbies then.  This time, I still feel like kinda of a newbie since it’s been so long, so it’s nice that at least SHE knows what she’s doing!
• I’m so relaxed this time.  I’ve had people tell me that I will be so much more protective of a girl.  So far, at least, that hasn’t held true at all.  Sure, I’m protective of her, but I liken it a lot more to how I felt after Harry was born.  I was oodles more protective of Liam, I think.  And it wasn’t just “protective”… I was very cautious of everything.  Like feeding. Until my milk was well established, I would obsessively pump every 2-3 hours, morning, noon and night.  This time, I’m a lot more casual about it.  If Liam had slept as much as Evie still does, I probably would have been waking him up all the time to eat.  As it is, I have had to wake her up a couple times (not at night, because I’m not INSANE), but I feel a lot more relaxed about the whole thing.  Kile, if anything, is more protective her than I am which I find just adorable.  He will NOT let her go 30 minutes without a hat on (yes, even at home) while I prefer to be able to see her hair now and then.
• I forgot how often newborns soil themselves.  She does it ALL THE TIME.  It’s amazing she still has any jaundice (which, yes, she does.  When will that go away??) with all the pooping she has done.  I routinely change her diaper each time I feed her and she still will go several times otherwise.  What a lady, huh?  We’re already done with our first pack of newborn swaddlers (god bless pampers) and starting our second.  And we only started using those when we got home from the hospital last week.  So we’re talking about 40 diapers in less than a week!  I’m just not used to that sort of output, I guess.
• There are differences, albeit subtle, between boys and girls.  I know people told me that would be the case, but I always figured that at least during the newborn stage they would be pretty similar.  And they are, but I have been surprised by the way they are different.  Evie seems to be a little quicker o the “uptake” than either of my boys were.  The breastfeeding is just part of it.  She has been trying to hold up her head since the day she was born, which neither of my boys were interested in attempting.  I’m also charmed by her “noises”.  Her cry is actually a lot deeper and raspier than either of my boys were, but her other noises are decidedly feminine.  Of course, every time she makes one of her little girly coos one of us threatens to eat her.  Or we just tell her, “You’re going to have to stop that.”  It’s just too cute.  Subtle differences, that could have more to do with her personality, but still.  And besides the few exceptions, boys and girls really aren’t much different at this age.

Have I left anything out?  Left you all hanging on some story, detail or explanation?  If so, slap me upside the head and let me know.  I’m still working on little sleep and a nasty cold, ya know.

I think I deserve a medal for posting this today.  It’s a shorter list than usual, mostly because I had a hard time keeping up with feeds period, much less thinking about which ones needed to be featured.  As a result, I worry that there have been fabulous posts that I missed in my hurry to clear my feed reader backlog (which, now that I think of it, hasn’t been empty for at least a week now… gah!).  Still, these are some great posts.  And I hope you enjoy them.

• An Open Letter to Fashionable Single Girls Who Spoil my dinner from Suburban Turmoil.  Reading this post, I felt her pain.   How many times have we experienced something even somewhat similar when out and about?  We too try what we can to limit our impact on others when eating out, but other people need to meet us halfway too.  Don’t you agree?
  
• Conversations I have with my husband when stangers are standing too close to us from The Bloggess. I laughed out loud.  Really hard (which made my incision hurt, but oh well).  Nosy people getting what they deserve!  What’s not to love?
  
• Male Pattern Blindness from Playgroups are No Place For Children.  OMG, YES.  Except, in our house we call it “Peeney Vision” (or at least I do).  I’m so happy to have another girl in the house now, maybe now when I send her to find something for me (in a few years, of course), she’ll actually be able to.  Here’s to hoping. 
  
• Happy? Birthday from Queen of Spain Blog. This is exactly how I feel on each of my children’s birthdays.  Except she is far more eloquent in her description of what it feels like to have your heart ripped from your chest every year than I could ever be.
  
• Makes-Me-Smile-Monday: When you want a baby and don’t have one, what on earth is there to smile about? from loraleeslooneytunes.com.  Loralee is an amazing gal.  Honestly, if you aren’t reading her, you should be.  She experienced a lot of personal pain this last week, yet she still had the class to beautifully congratulate me and another new mom on our new babies.  Thank you, Loralee.
  
• Full Feeds are Better from Blogging Pro. I’ve been saying it all along, haven’t I?  Full feeds are where it’s at.  And it does seem as though the internet is (finally) trending towards more full feeds than not.  Still, this is a great article that discusses just WHY full feeds are important.  If you aren’t offering full feeds on your blog, you need to check this post out.
  
• High from The Bloggess.  Another one from The Bloggess!  What can i say, she’s funny!  But what is even funnier is when she’s doped up on some good drugs.  Laughed my silly little arse off, I did.  Leprechauns, indeed!
  
• The Icebreaker from Citizen of the Month. Neil is a kick, isn’t he? I loved this story of him trying to fit in with a group of basketball-loving guys and finding little in common with them… until one guy found out he had a blog read by lots of women, that is.  Ha! 
  
• Why I Should Stop Checking My Referrals. from Flotsam. Sometimes, the audacity of people really just boggles my mind.  And I know that at least 80% of it is because of the anonymity that the Internet affords people.  No way would most of these people do things like this right to someone’s face.  And that, my friends, is cowardice.  Anyhow, of all people, she probably deserved this the least this week.  My sympathies to her.

See, it’s a short list.  I apologize and hope to be back to myself a bit more last week.  No guarantees, though (are there ever when there’s a new baby involved?).  As for me, despite being incredibly EXHAUSTED (sleep is for pansies), I’m starting to feel more like myself.  Woo hoo!