Doing so much better now | slackermama . com

Thank you to everyone who commented last week when I was feeling bad about my relationship with Liam while we were away. I’m pleased to report that things are much more back to normal now. I’ve found the joy in interacting with Liam once again and I am so happy for that. From the day he was born, he’s been my special guy. Perhaps it’s because of all the struggle we went through in order to bring him into our lives, but I’ve always been able to tolerate quite a bit of shenanigans from that child. The little stuff doesn’t bother me so much anymore and I’ve always been happy that I can sit back and enjoy the mischevious glint in his eyes without worrying so much about what he’s going to DO with that mischevious glint.

I guess if we’re going to be honest, it wasn’t JUST our trip to Elko that caused a strain. Surely, the birth of Evie has contributed. I have less time for him. Less opportunities for snuggles on my lap. My days are more packed and more tiresome.

In the last week, however, I’ve mellowed out again and yesterday (and for the last several days) I was downright charmed by my middle child. He was being especially sweet. Or rather, I was noticing his intentions better. What I was seeing as him pestering Evie was him trying to help out with her. He wasn’t just throwing toy cars at her, he was giving her the cars to play with when she was being fussy. He wasn’t trying to hassle her by rocking her carseat violently in the shopping cart, he was trying to soothe her as he has seen us do (though a bit more on the rough side, to be honest).

He’s still a sweet boy, with a wide, open face, twinkling eyes and engaging grin. He wants love and cuddles as much as he ever did. And I’ve been a lot more happy to indulge him in that desire. I guess, in a way, being the only one around here who can lug him around these days has “forced” me to spend more time with him without Evie between us. I’m directly involved in all of his activities once again. It used to be that after Kile was home at night, he would take over with Liam and they would play together while I fed and cared for Evie. Kile would put him to bed himself. I never questioned it.

Now, I take a part in that. I carry him up to bed. I still leave so that they can have their time alone together, but on nights like last night where Liam needed extra assurance before bed, I was on hand to pick him up, rub his back and give him lots of loves.

This time is SO fleeting. He’s already growing up so much. I can’t believe his birthday is in just a couple weeks (two, I think. Or less. GAH). Yesterday, he ran towards me, chattering “Ma-ma-ma-ma! Mama!” He isn’t what I would call a talkative sort, but he is saying more and more words every day. And even if he isn’t saying it, he’s understanding it. On “Blue’s Clues” yesterday (a personal favorite of his that I can’t help but indulge), there was talk of jumping. Liam got excited by this and I asked him if he was going to jump. And jump he did, a big grin on his face. He loves to jump.

I guess this post is rather ramble-y and has no real point. But I wanted to let you all know that your advice and shoulder-pats did help. And I wanted to let you know that things are getting better around here. And I had to chuckle at everyone who suggested our trip to visit my parents here in a couple weeks will SURELY be less stressful. Only Michelle got it right. She knows my parents and nailed it on the head. It WILL be worse at my parents’ house. MUST BRING BABY GATE. And BOOZE. (For me, not Liam, though I can’t promise anything.)

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