It would seem that my frustration from yesterday did not dissipate overnight like I had hoped it would. Then again, I’m not sure why I expected it to since Evie is in the throes of teething and wanted to use me as a pacifier all night long. My rest wasn’t exactly restful.
My resentment, therefore, has only multiplied and today hasn’t gotten off to a very good start. I suppose this means I should be paying extra attention to “Blue’s Clues” this morning, as the lesson is in how to best deal with frustration (”Stop. Breathe. And think!”). Somehow, though, I just don’t think that’s going to work for me today.
Thank you to everyone who posted words of encouragment on my little rant yesterday. I was worried that my hormones had gotten the better of me and that I had overreacted. And while I probably did at least a little, hearing that what this office did was pretty shitty after all really helped. So thanks. Sometimes, a person just needs to hear that they aren’t completely batshit crazy.
Today would be the day I would normally post a WordPress Bootcamp but you’ll have to forgive me if I’m not exactly feeling it. I might do it tomorrow or I might put it off until next week. We’ll see how many chidren survive the day today and how I feel about life at the end of it.
Is it possible to be both angry and tired at the same time? And when I say angry, I really mean a range of negative emotions that include frustrated (”Stop. Breathe. And think!”), sad, guilty, annoyed, and resentful. I feel so angry that I practically shake. And at the same time, I’m so tired that I feel like I could fall asleep right here (perhaps even with my eyes open). I want to crawl up into bed (perhaps even alone for a change, no offense, Evie) and sleep for weeks on end. I want to just forget my responsibilities and float away. At least for a little while (until the guilt got to be too much).
See, even now I’m feeling guilty for this post even existing and I’m tempted to just erase it and pretend it never existed. But I’m going to go ahead and post it anyhow, before I let the guilt take over.
{ 3 comments }
crunchy carpets (18 comments.) 09.24.08 at 10:05 am
Oh and the site looks gorgeous!!!
Casey (15 comments.) 09.24.08 at 12:46 pm
Please don’t feel guilty that you wrote about your frustrating experience. I went on quite a rant this week on my blog and it helped me to feel better after I got it all out. Spill it, sister! Life is tough right now and you need to be able to vent somewhere.
michelle 09.25.08 at 6:42 am
Life occasionally sucks. You have every right to acknowledge the crap when it hits the fan. To rant about the crap. But you don’t have to feel guilty about it.
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