Dear Laptop,

Listen, I know it’s not all your fault. Yes, you’re a Dell and apparently you are prone to being a little on the SUCKTASTIC side, but in this particular instance, The Toddler had as much a hand in your destruction as anything else. Though, to be fair, your keys have demonstrated previously that they are sub-par. I have, after all, had to train myself to use the right-hand “control” key instead of the far superior left-hand one.

But I’m telling you, it’s going to be difficult to get used to not having an “x”, “g” or “u” button. There just aren’t any duplicates of those on the keyboard.

Unfortunately, now is not a good time to replace you. In fact, Kile and I had just been talking about how the soonest we could do that would be February. Because, frankly, you’ve been declining rapidly lately. Perhaps you saw all that stuff I wrote about you on my blog. But you’re taking forever to run simple applications and you keep making Firefox scared. So I know you are looking forward to your retirement just as much as I am.

But I’ve got to ask you to just hold on another couple of months. I know it won’t be easy. Believe me, I’d far rather replace you with a (non-Dell) new laptop, but I just can’t right now.

So let’s put our differences behind us and try to work together here, okay? PLEASE? I’m not asking for the world here. Plus, you sorta owe me for being such a crappy laptop in the first place.

Yours Truly,
Marilyn

So, yet again, I was unable to get a post up by 10am. But this time, it wasn’t all my fault. I was upstairs starting a load of laundry and scanning an important document for Kile. When I came downstairs, my laptop looked like this:

Edited to add: I wrote this and took the photo from my iPhone.  I have replaced a good number of my keys but some I don’t think I CAN replace as they seem irreversably broken (much like my cntrl key was broken.  AUGH!)

Edited again to add: In case it’s not clear, Liam did this while I was upstairs.  I am still in shock.  My laptop is pretty much USELESS now.