So excited and SO nervous

Today is Liam’s first day of Kindergarten.  This is a day I feel like I’ve been anticipating since Evie was born and Liam decided he was going to perform the “wild child” duties for our family.  And when I found out that he would be going ALL DAY LONG, well, that just sweetened the deal.  But then again.  He’s a little guy physically.  He’s also on the young side, having only just turned 5 barely a month ago.  And he’s pretty immature (a result, I’m sure of being around his younger sister so much and clamoring for the attention she has received).  School… all day… I haven’t been sure the poor kid can hold up to it.  And, quite honestly, I’m half expecting a phone call from the office telling me to come pick him up any moment.

My nerves about today have been growing steadily over the last week.  Last night?  I had a hard time falling asleep.  And then staying asleep.  And this morning I was up early, a bundle of nervous energy fixing his lunch and making sure his backpack was together.  He ran downstairs this morning, dressed in a fine outfit and looking very excited.  But I detected some nerves on his part as well.  Especially when time drew near to leave the house.  He asked Evie if she was going to miss him.  And then he asked her to say goodbye to him.  She obliged of course, not entirely understanding the significance of this day, I’m sure.

Harry kept an eye on Evie for us while we drove Liam down to school.  The nearer we got to the kindergarten, the quieter and slower he got.  The yard was full of parents, grandparents and siblings and other nervous kindergarteners.  A few were enjoying the playground equipment, but most of the others hung around their parents legs, watching.  Liam was in the former group.

This was the closest to a smile that I was going to get.

His teacher didn’t show up until the bell rang.  By that time the kids had already begun to form a rudimentary line up.  And Liam’s nerves started to show in earnest.  We could barely get him to look at us, much less smile.  He fidgeted, wiping his nose and playing with the straps on his backpack.

He looked so little standing in that line.  And yes, there were quite a few kids who were bigger than he was.  But we were surprised that he wasn’t the smallest kid there either.  Not that there were any kids smaller than him but plenty that were his size.  So that made us feel a bit better.  And hopefully, it’ll make him feel better too.

Liam's First Day of Kindergarten
Definitely no smiles now.

We snapped a last picture before the kids filed into the classroom.  I felt a lot more choked up than I expected to be.  This was… IS a huge step.  Yesterday was the end of the Old Era.  Today was the dawn of a New Era.  However it all ends up working out, things will be different from now on and they won’t ever be like they were.  Which isn’t a bad thing.  But change is pretty much always scary.

And while I sit here at home with Evie, marveling at how quiet and peaceful everything is, there is a large part of me that can’t wait to pick him up at 3pm, to see what he thought of his first day of school.

  • karen

    We are on day 3 of first grade…I totally understand. In a few days, he’ll be leaping out of the car before you’ve even stopped, barely even a wave to deal dear old mum.

  • Carrie

    Speaking of back-to-school, have you heard of Class Wish? It is a nonprofit site where parents, teachers, and communities easily unite to provide the classroom resources our children need. Find out more at

  • Mich @ running sandals

    Aww, he is such a baby! I remember the first day I brought my daughter to her class and she won’t get her hand off me, I think it’s the same with your boy. :)

  • root canal Salt Lake City

    First time in school is really a big thing for kids. I can still remember that mom would actually stay for how many hour inside the room for my brother would certainly cry a river if she left.

  • Susan

    Our little guy starts this fall, but he is the second. The 5 year old goes into grade one and he starts JK. I remember dropping of our oldest, Sophia while taking Ethan and Sierra in the strollers and prams (we are close enough to walk) – and now It’s Ethan’s day. How quiet the house will be….

  • double strollers for infant and toddler

    At that age, usually they are itching to get in there and enjoy their friends, or they are impossibly reluctant to leave Mommy. So far, we are two for two with wanting to go to school – but the third is very much Mummy’s girl so we will see!
    double strollers for infant and toddler´s last blog post ..What’s The Best Double Stroller for Toddler and Infant?

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